Growing Up With Siblings

I really wanted a little sister for my 3 year old daughter, it just seemed more convenient, economical, and even socially they would have similar interests.

Did you ever wish you had a same sex sibling?

Sarah Bowman
Sarah Bowman, studied family dynamics formally and informally all my life

I had same-sex siblings (sisters) as well as brothers, several of each. Just because you have two little girls does not guarantee that they will have the same interests or get along. Not all girls like “girlie stuff.” Some boys don’t like “tough” stuff. But most follow the stereotype. You could get two girls who will both love the exact same things and therefore always fight for the same item, including boys. On the other hand, you could get two perfectly matched daughters, and in the end one manages to be more popular with the boys than the other.

Economically, it definitely works better to have all girls or all boys so you can hand down clothes from one to the other. Of course, that means the older one will always get new clothes with the next one having to grow up in hand-me-downs, something that can cause friction. One mother I know solved this by telling the younger girl, “It’s new for you.” Somehow, her daughter was content with that answer. I doubt I would have been. I happened to be the oldest and grew up getting new clothes every new season. I was taken aback when I found out that my youngest sister was thirteen before she got her first new outfit.

I don’t want to discourage you from having two kids. I only want to disillusion you about the perfect family; it probably doesn’t exist. But problems about clothes and boyfriends can normally be solved eventually in a healthy functional family.


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